Clarks: frustration

I guess that usually the blog is supposed to be a good news forum. But if you will suffer it, today I want to share my frustration and despair. Today is not a happy day. Today is a day when all my blessings feel like curses. The more I'm given, the more is required of me. And the more that is asked of me, the less I feel I have to give.
Someone - some of you, no doubt - would say that "it will pass" and that the troubles I feel are so serious and monumental today will seem like nothing in a day or a week or a month from now. Maybe so, but what about today? Why does today have to be suffered through? And besides, whether or not these exact problems are still hounding me a month from now or not, there will be next month's problems - and as the good book says, they are enough.
A curse - an illness - brought about our decision to seek house help, a maid/cook to come over a few times each week. Actually, the curse would not have been enough by itself. A blessing - the pregnancy - also influenced our decision; the idea being that Cec needed more reliable nutrition and I needed help to not be constantly doing dishes and sweeping. The curse seemed at the time to have a silver lining, in that it was the thing that pushed us to make the decision we'd been thinking of. The price, though, seemed prohibitive. Two other blessings - a part-time/temporary writing job for good pay, and a free mountain bike - came along just before the curse of illness, by the way. But before I could ride the bike [still haven't], the cold/flu struck me down; and now, the extra work... It is no longer a joy but a burden; it is no longer extra money - it is just what we need [actually, still a little less] to pay for the blessing [or is it curse?] of the maid. Without the money, we couldn't afford the help; but without the help, we wouldn't need the extra money, and I could be free to accept or reject the work offer without obligation. I guess I'd already accepted the work before the maid... I don't know...
I can't even think or write clearly b/c the maid, and Cecely, and the washing machine, and no telling what else are all demanding my attention - which ought to be focused, not on a gripy blog post, but on the freelance writing, anyway.
So... I'll just wrap this up...
Look, I may end up taking this post down soon after I post it. But I am going to go ahead and put it up here for now, and I would ask, if you're one of the people to see it, maybe you can just make a comment below and say a prayer above and just hope for the best. Today, I am frustrated. Sometimes this is how it feels to be me.